1991

Looking back, 1991 was an odd year for music. My top 5 are obvious classics in my mind, but the rest of the list is filled with some odd choices covering very different genres of music. I was 10 at the time, so obviously I didn't discover some of these until much later in life, but here you go- my top 10 for 1991. 

First, honorable mention:

Soundgarden- Badmotorfinger: This album is classic... for the first half. "Rusty Cage," "Outshined," "Slaves And Bulldozers," and especially "Jesus Christ Pose" are fantastic alternative rock/grunge songs perfectly showcasing the genre as well as Chris Cornell's pipes. Heavy and awesome stuff- the rest of the album just doesn't come close to holding up. 

Skid Row- Slave To The Grind: Skid Row got heavier as "Monkey Business" and "Slave To The Grind" showed, but their attachment to cowbells and guitar squeels held them back. This is a solid album, but fails to hold up to its best songs. This may have been the year that I started to outgrow 80's hair metal, along with the rest of the nation. 

Jesus Jones- Doubt: This is an odd choice, but this tape dominated my stereo for a large part of this year, and maybe its just the feeling of reminiscence, but the hits still sound good to me today. It's alternative rock in love with new wave synthesizers, with odd airy vocals, but in 1991, it ruled. Sure, "Right Here, Right Now," and "Real, Real, Real" are classics, but there are some hidden gems on this album.

Ice-T- OG: Original Gangster: I never liked Ice-T's voice all that much, but this album was hard to deny. "Home Of The Bodybag," "Pulse Of The Rhyme," and "The Tower" are mean gangsta rap songs, and even though much of this is extremely dated and much too funky rap, Ice-T's storytelling and beats still sound good. And the Led Zeppelin-sampled "Midnight" is still one of the meanest rap songs I've heard.

EMF- Schubert Dip: My best memory of this album was stacking wood with my dad and brother for an entire day, and then playing soccer, using the woodpiles to bounce the ball off of for weeks after. Pretty much the entire time, we were listening to this album on repeat. This album is, like Jesus Jones, alternative rock mixed with techno and synthesizers, but much more dancey and techno-based. The first 4 songs, ending with the classic "Unbelievable" are pure 1991 radio adrenaline.

10. Slint- Spiderland

Sure, I didn't hear about his album untiul probably 8 or 9 years later, but part of what is so impressive about it is that these college kids were making this kind of music in 1991. The album as a whole, in my opinion, is nowhere near as good as the credit it gets. In fact, my version has a few songs deleted, and a few added to make it better ("Glen" and "Rhoda" from the follow-up EP) but it still has its moments. The music is odd- spoken word stories broken up with occasional screams and singing, repetitive beats, and very distorted and evil riffs and guitar lines that sometimes find their way to beauty. And dynamics. Good lord, dynamics. A fairly regularly drugged girl in my class used to write "Good Morning Captain" on her arm every day- I never got why, but after finally hearing the song, I understood that she was at least obsesseed with an awesome song. The album as a whole is solid, but this would have landed in my top 10 for the song "Washer" alone- I have written at least 2 songs that are based off the opneing chord, and I spent hours in high school playing guitar with one friend and then playing guitar while another friend played piano, all to the key and chords of this song. It is creepy and beautiful, and one of the first songs I ever heard that mixed minor dissonant notes with major pretty ones to such perfect effect. This band was on to something- too bad they stopped. 

Best songs: "Breadcrumb Trail," "Nosferatu Man," "Washer," "Good Morning, Captain."

9. Public Enemy- Apocalypse 91... The Enemy Strikes Black

This is one of the first albums I ever bought on CD, recommended to me by a guy I knew in high school named Jackson Stegman. I got it used for like 8 bucks, and I instantly loved it. I never loved Chuck D's voice and never fully understood the purpose of Flavor Flav (the first ever true hype man), but the beats were catchy, at times heavy, at times funky and poppy, but always good. Songs changed very quickly- there was always so much going on in each song. In a time of rap that was often very boring and didn't stand for anything, not only did this offer something completely different, it also remains one of the most classic rap albums for how catchy it is. From the horn-sampled "Can't Truss It" to the head-bobbing beat of "By The Time I Get To Arizona" to probably the second mainstream combination of rap and rock ever (the first being Aerosmith and Run DMC) of "Bring The Noise" with Anthrax of all bands, this album is great. I won't lie either- I always felt kind of cool being a white kid in Maine listening to Public Enemy in middle school. 

Best songs: "Lost At Birth," "Can't Truss It," "By The Time I Get To Arizona," "Shut 'Em Down," "Bring The Noise (with Anthrax)."

8. Guns N' Roses- Use Your Illusion (Vols. 1 and 2)

I'm cheating a bit on this one. See, I never owned these albums- growing up, I wasn't allowed to get any albums with parental advisory stickers, so I never got into Guns N' Roses more than just their hits. I never owned an album. So when 2 albums came out, I wasn't that interested, and wasn't even able to buy them anyway. Years later, I gave them a shot and they aren't that great- they are full of forgettable semi bluesy, bar rockers- songs that probably would have been awesome if I had heard them back then, or if I was drunk in the L.A. bars they were writing them for. But they are still pretty blah, and their existence makes me wonder why these albums are so regarded. Oh wait, the hits. Ohhh the hits. Listening to Volume 1, it doesn't even make sense where "November Rain" came from- it is a black sheep in the truest sense of the term- the only song that comes close to its sound and beauty is the other biggest hit, "Don't Cry." Volume 2 is the better, more adventurous half, featuring the haunting "Civil War," the awesome Terminator 2 rockfest "You Could Be Mine," and the incredible and vastly underrated last piece of the video trilogy, "Estranged." Is it fair to combine just the hits of 2 albums into one and say it was one of the best albums of 1991? Probably not, but I don't care. Guns N' Roses dominated MTV and the radio with their hits, and it was well deserved. Just take the hits and combine the two albums (what they should have done in the first place) and you have an epic and groundbreaking album that makes me sad Axl went crazy. Wouldn't it have been better if "Chinese Democracy" had just never come out?

Best songs: "Don't Cry," "November Rain," "The Garden," "Dead Horse," "Civil War," "Knockin' On Heaven's Door," "You Could Be Mine," "Estranged."

7. Metallica- Self-titled (The Black Album)

Over time, I would grow to not really love Metallica. Lars Ulrich's whole napster ordeal, the faces he makes while playing drums, the St. Anger album, the slow realization that doing James Hetfield impressions (you know, ending everything with EAHHH or YEAAAH) somewhat ruined his vocals for me forever- all these combined with time really took their toll on my enjoyment of their music. But when this album came out, there was nothing heavier. "Enter Sandman" was all over MTV, "Sad But True" and "Wherever I May Roam" followed (and ruled), and proved that slowing down their music and some better songwriting had made them a beast. And "The Unforgiven" and "Nothing Else Matters" proved how good they were at writing slower songs too. The rest of the album never really caught on with me though- listening to it now, I'm not sure I ever really listened to anything more than the hits. The other songs just didn't hold up. But for those hits alone, and Metallica's domination of everything that year (my mom even liked them!), I have to include this.  

Best songs: "Enter Sandman," "Sad But True," "The Unforgiven," "Wherever I May Roam," "Nothing Else Matters."

6. Ween- The Pod

Well, this list just got weird. I got into Ween with 1994's "Chocolate And Cheese," and upon hearing that I liked them, my 10th grade English teacher (who I would see like 15 years later at a ween show- that guy rules) gave me a tape with selected old ween songs, mostly from "God Ween Satan" and this, their best album before 1994. Ween is not for everyone, and REALLY wasn't for everyone when this came out. All of the songs are horribly recorded with detuned instruments, crappy drum machines, slowed down vocals, and drugs. Lots of drugs. All in an apartment, all done by Gene and Dean Ween. How could this be good? I'm not sure, but it is. Some of their catchiest, most fun songs (that they still play live) are on this, from the dancey and fun "Dr. Rock" and"Awesome Sound" to the more dancey, more fun, and catchier "Pork Roll Egg And Cheese"to the fuzzed-out rock jam "Sketches Of Winkle" to the wasted-out-of-their-minds stoner fest of "Mononucleosis" to the unbelievably horrible "Boing" and "The Stallion, pt. 1." Its just an odd, odd adventure to listen to this album. And I love it. My favorite song though, is "Pollo Asado," which features a man ordering Mexican food over a chilled out elevator music, all to someone who can't count change. This is music? Yup. Amazing music. 

Best songs: "Dr. Rock," "Pollo Asado," "Right To The Ways And The Rules Of The World," "Captain Fantasy," "Awesome Sound," "Sketches Of Winkle," "Pork Roll Egg And Cheese."

5. Lenny Kravitz- Mama Said

I first heard Lenny Kravitz along with most of the world, with 1993's "Are You Gonna Go My Way." After falling in love with that album, I checked this one out, and instantly saw where the funk sound he touched on came from. This album is exactly that- classic rock mixed with funk and soul, Curtis Mayfield and Prince. There are some serious snore-fests towards the middle/end of the album, but it starts off with the fantastic (and featuring Slash) "Fields Of Joy" and "Always On The Run." He then moves into some soul/love balladry with "Stand By My Woman Now" and more funk with the often used in TV "It Ain't Over 'Til It's Over." Every song sounds different, but similar enough that it works great as a cohesive album that came out 15 years later than it should have. It's a shame most people judge Lenny Kravitz for his god awful cover of "American Woman" or have only heard "Are You Gonna Go My Way," because they're missing, at least for his early albums, a really great songwriter who not only wrote most of these songs alone, but recorded 95% of them solo as well. 

Best Songs: "Fields Of Joy," "Always On The Run," "It Ain't Over 'Til It's Over," "What The Fuck Are We Saying?"

4. Pearl Jam- Ten

At first, I wasn't sure about Pearl Jam. They were being included a lot in talks with the almighty Nirvana, and I didn't hear much of a connection. "Even Flow" was good, but it didn't do much for me. Eddie Vedder's vocals were a little too low and rough. I didn't love the sound and I didn't get the hype. And then I heard "Alive." This song changed everything. At about 3:41, when the song should end, and they instead kick in with solos and rocking out for another 2 minutes (and the video features Vedder climbing into the rafters and jumping into the crowd), I realized there was something special here.  This wasn't just "another grunge band"- they had a slight 70's rock feel to them, and a timelessness that, while I am not really a fan anymore, has still propelled them into 2011 and commonly being referred to as one of the best live bands in existence. I won't lie- I never really listened to the last 3 songs on this, and deleted them off my itunes version and added the classic "Yellow Ledbetter" as the closing track, but up until those forgettable songs, every song on this album is great. From the soulful "Black" to the classic and oddly creepy "Jeremy," to the sped up rocker "Porch," this is just a classic rock album. 

Best songs: "Once," "Even Flow," "Alive," "Black," "Jeremy."

3. Primus- Sailing The Seas Of Cheese

I'm very proud that an album this weird is the first album I ever owned on CD. I don't know how this tradition started (I must have gotten this as part as a Secret Santa before Christmas) but I listen to, of all songs, "Here Come The Bastards" every Christmas morning before I go downstairs to open presents. This is the second best Primus album, and, as all good Primus goes, it's all over the place. "Here Come The Bastards"is a stompy, marching song based on 2 notes. "American Life" is dark and melodic, "Jerry Was A Race Car Driver" (the first song I ever heard by Primus) is fast and rocks harder than most of their songs, "Is It Luck?" is a mess and has the most ridiculous bass line ever, and "Tommy The Cat" (also featured on the Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey soundtrack) is a story about a cat, featuring a gruff voiced... cat, talking about... cats. It's a weird, odd, mess, and in typical Primus fashion, it's fantastic. It even features a reprise called "Los Bastardos" which features a sample from the awesome and short-lived British comedy, The Young Ones. When I saw The Young Ones 10 or so years later in college, the shock of realizing what that sample was from was pretty amazing. Great album.

Best songs: "Here Come The Bastards, ""American Life," "Jerry Was A Race Car Driver," "Is It Luck?," "Tommy The Cat," "Those Damned Blue-Collar Tweekers," "Fish On (Fisherman Chronicles, Chapter 2)."

2. Red Hot Chili Peppers- Blood Sugar Sex Magik

I didn't like Red Hot Chili Peppers at first. I liked "Give It Away," but the video (featuring barely clothed men painted silver dancing around the desert) weirded me out, and when my brother got it from BMG (remember them?), I felt they were a little too funky and jammy- not the sound I wanted at all. Then I heard the classic "Under The Bridge," and I realized they at least had 2 good songs. I finally heard "Breaking The Girl" and decided it was time to give it a try again. There are hits everywhere on this- both melodic (the two I just mentioned, "I Could Have Lied"), heavy and driving ("Suck My Kiss"), and funky and weird all over the place (the songs that weren't hits). There are a few duds that drag on too long, but generally, the strength of the non-hits says a lot about this album. It really is a journey through a whole bunch of different sounds to create a sound that still remains completely their own. Flea gets a lot of credit for his playing, but it really is the strength of everyone in the band that make this band so good, and this is a fantastic first mainstream album. If this is the first album you ever heard by them (like it was for me), treat it as their debut- in my opinion, they kind of didn't know what they were doing before this. But this album, they got it right and started a long list of fantastic albums over the next 20 years. 

Best songs: "Breaking The Girl," "Suck My Kiss," "I Could Have Lied, "Give It Away," "Blood Sugar Sex Magik," Under The Bridge."

1. Nirvana- Nevermind

I could just write "duh" and that would be enough. This album is on every top ten list ever, and it is well deserved. Did they do anything new? No, they even admit to ripping off the Pixies and smaller bands. Was Kurt Cobain an amazing singer? Nope. He even proves that on this album. Was he a great guitarist? Nope. Most songs were incredibly simple, and he mostly played power chords. So why does it get so much credit? Well, simply, they did this type of music better than anyone at the time, nobody had heard music like this at the time, and they just wrote damn good songs. It's really as simple as that. 

I still remember the first time I heard Nirvana, and it was the same as most people- watching the video for "Smells Like Teen Spirit" on MTV, featuring Cobain in a dirty striped sweater, and Krist Novoselic looking like a tall awkward bum they found on the street. Dave Grohl was the only one who looked like he belonged in a band on MTV, and that made him the outcast. Cheerleaders wore black shirts with anarchy symbols, there were mosh pits in bleachers, and nobody could understand what Kurt was saying and eventually screaming. And it was AWESOME. 

My brother gave me the cassette single (with the B-side of "Been A Son," a pretty bad song that makes me laugh since it was the second song I ever heard by Nirvana) and after wearing it out, I finally got the tape for Christmas or my birthday that same year. 

It instantly became my favorite album, and I became a huge fan of all things Nirvana. I watched every video a billion times and wore out the album. I was in awe. Kurt Cobain made me want to grow my hair out and be a rock star. I wanted to be him. Well, I thought I did. I remember the day I found out he died. The night it was announced, my father and I had gone to a Celtics game, and on the ride home, I found a radio station that was, for some reason, playing nothing but Nirvana. I was blown away and it made for a fantastic ride home. The next day my mom would break me the news, leading to sadness, confusion, and the slow acceptance that my awesome rock star was a mess of drug addiction, and because of this, I would have no new music from my favorite band. It's interesting to think about how different it is now- that we know everything that every band is doing the second they are doing it, but back then, I had no idea that Kurt Cobain even did drugs or was even unhappy (well, until the near overdose).

But all emotions and history aside, this album often gets credited as being so big solely because it was something different at the time- a direct response to all the bad that was on the radio. And Nirvana often only gets credit for being so famous because of this and the eventual death a few years later. Yes, in a way, they are overrated. But not too much. Because this album still, 20 years later, sounds fantastic. Every song is great. The production is perfect. It just rules. The songs are great rock songs, flat out, with a weird creepiness from his vocals and the production and the fact that nobody on earth knew what the hell he was singing about. From "Smells Like Teen Spirit" (one of the best opening tracks ever) to my personal favorite and drastically underrated "In Bloom" to huge hit "Come As You Are" to weird "Polly," to the disgusting freakout of "Territorial Pissings" (the end still makes me laugh) to pissed rocker "Stay Away" and great closer (although I still feel like it should be in the middle, since that's how it was on my original tape) "Something In The Way"(which, incidentally, is the easiest song ever to play on guitar), this album is just an assault of awesome and it dominated my early 90's and still gets plays today, though, as I'm listening and writing all of this, not enough. Well done, Nirvana.

Best songs: "Smells Like Teen Spirit," "In Bloom," "Come As You Are," "Polly," "Territorial Pissings," "Drain You," "Stay Away," '"Something In The Way."

1990

For the last 5 years, I've read a bunch of year-end lists and said to myself, "I listen to more music than most people I know and care entirely too much about it, and like making lists... why don't I do that?" But every year, I have failed because of 3 reasons that all work together:

1. I'm insanely lazy

2. I fell into the trap of thinking about THAT year when I should have been thinking about the previous year. It surprises me how many reputable magazines and websites don't see a problem with making a "Best of 2010" on January 1st of 2011. You're telling me that you heard everything that came out that year? Everything? Because of this, I always put off my list, and soon enough, another year has passed.

And, lastly,

3. Certain albums grow on you over time, and others become annoying and horrible. It's better to wait a while to see if an album stands the test of time- that it's still good even after your tastes have changed. And boy, did I wait.

So, I decided to FINALLY make year end lists, but in an undertaking of epic proportions, I'm starting with the year that the first album came out that I would proudly call my favorite album for years (1989) and going from there. Albums are being judged on everything you'd expect- how well the band did with what they were going for, groundbreaking-ness, uniqueness, lasting value, what it has meant to me over time, catchiness, etc. Some lists will be odd (like this one), and some may not make sense (how did _____'s album get rated at number 5 in 1995 when their clearly better 1997 album isn't even on your 1997 list? Well, simply, because better stuff came out in 1997). This will be a blast for me, and I can't wait to see how my lists look over the years. 

So, without further ado, here is my top 10 for 1990 (and since nothing else really came out then, this will be the "1990 and before" list. The oldest album I have listed is from 1986, and I was 5 when that came out, so that's why I don't have anything older. Yes, some great albums came out in the 60's and 70's, but I didn't hear them until the 90's, so I'm trying to stick with albums that I heard the year they came out):

First- Honorable Mention:

Alice in Chains- Facelift: A solid album, but they hadn't hit their stride yet. "We Die Young," "Sunshine" and of course "Man In The Box" were great and showed their creepy, minor note drug mess coming out, but the rest of the album drags a bit. 

Skid Row- Self Titled: Classic late 80's hair pop metal. The lame songs were fun, sex-filled songs full of cowbells, solos, and Sebastian Bach's amazing pipes. The good songs were incredible and still hit home. "18 And Life" is fantastic, and "I Remember You" is certainly the best ballad of the 80s, if not the greatest ballad of all time. After hundreds of listens, it still gets to me. But as an album? Hit or miss.

Metallica- Master of Puppets: I was late on Metallica. I heard this after the black album, so metal purists can say I'm a fool all they want, but it's hard to go back to an older sound after hearing the new. That being said, this album is still awesome. It drags a bit towards the end, but "Battery," "Master of Puppets" and "Welcome Home (Sanitarium)" are classics that still rule today. 

Edward Scissorhands Soundtrack (by Danny Elfman): I think this was the first movie that hit me in a way that made me want to cry. It wasn't until recently that I realized the shots of beautiful Winonna Ryder dancing in the snow created by lonely and super emo Edward Scissorhands were so mesmerizing 99% because of the power of the music. It is haunting, sad, beautiful, fairytale-like, and amazing. There will always be a place in my heart for this movie and soundtrack. 

Nirvana- Bleach: "Blew" is gross but somehow a catchy headbanger, "About A Girl" is sunny and pretty, "School" is a fast rocker, "Love Buzz" has a bass line that will stick in your head for hours, and "Negative Creep" is a fast, ugly mess that still rules. The rest of this album, though, is hit or miss ("Paper Cuts" is hilariously awful). This is a solid first album, but a bit too ugly and messy to be anything but.

10. Motley Crue- Dr. Feelgood

I still remember the first time I heard Motley Crue. It was watching the video for "Dr. Feelgood" in my Great Uncle's TV room, being completely enthralled by this odd tent in the desert filled with 80's hair metal and various forms of debauchery. And the song opened with palm muted guitar chugs (!), a sound that would dominate my late college years. I would later learn that pretty much every song on this was about sex, and Motley Crue was just a mess of sex and drugs, but to the 8-10 year old listening, this album was just pure metal of epic proportions. Solos everywhere, awesomely recorded drums, Vince Neil's great vocals, and hooks, hooks, hooks. Give it a listen with two goals: Try to NOT sing along to "Don't Go Away Mad (Just Go Away)" and try to listen to "Kickstart My Heart" without getting pumped up. This is truly a great 80's pop metal album. 

Best songs: "Dr. Feelgood," "Kickstart My Heart," "Without You," "Don't Go Away Mad (Just Go Away)."

9. Poison- Flesh & Blood

Poison, the band who dominated my youth, took an odd leap with this album. They started out as the epitome of everything 80's hair metal was, but slowly let their blues influences come out. When this first came out, I had trouble with it- where were all the hits? Why does Bret Michaels suddenly have a southern accent? I recently revisited this though, and found it to be nothing if not an interesting ride- a mix of hair metal ("Unskinny Bop" (I still don't know what that means) "Hell Or High Water"), country/blues ("Let It Play," "Poor Boy Blues"), and incredible and sad ballads about life and death rather than girls ("Life Goes On," "Something To Believe In"). The rest of the songs mixed everything together into one sound. This was a tough one at the time, but over the course of 20 years, it's become a very solid album.

Best songs: "Life Goes On," "Something To Believe In," "Life Loves A Tragedy."

8. Nine Inch Nails- Pretty Hate Machine

My first introduction to Nine Inch Nails, like most people, was the video for "Head Like a Hole," featuring a dreadlock-mohawked Trent Reznor and a backing band who looked like members of the Borg, with Trent ending the video wrapped up in wires, upside down, writhing in pain. I was pretty much instantly sold. A friend recorded a tape of this album for me, and while I was instantly let down that the rest of the album didn't live up to the intensity of that song, it eventually grew on me, and would lead the way to a band that would soon become a favorite. It's not terribly groundbreaking, but it's an interesting album- I hadn't heard dancey, electronic and industrial beats done in a catchy way before, while also being really dark and mysterious. Sure, most of this sounds pretty dated, but they did this sound better than anyone else I had heard at the time, and the very existence of a dark and beautiful song like "Something I Can Never Have" smackdab in the middle of this otherwise dancey album really showed that Nine Inch Nails may be on to something much bigger than this. This is a great debut album that sounds dated while still standing the test of time.

Best songs: "Head Like a Hole," "Terrible Lie," "Something I Can Never Have," "Sin," "The Only Time."

7. Def Leppard- Hysteria

What an odd mix of music- Arpeggiated, U2-esque guitar, atmospheric backgrounds, long songs full of different effects and sounds, insanely echoed and simple drums (I didn't know till much later that the drummer only had one arm), and echoed and often multi-tracked-to-the-point-of-full-stadium-sounding-chorus vocals. And it worked. This album sounded different from everything else, and even sounded different from other Def Leppard albums. They just got it right on this one. Nearly every classic is on this. My fondest memory of this album is playing musical chairs at a Halloween party in Nathaniel Hawthorne's boyhood home, to the tune of "Hysteria." It was odd and very cool. That, and growing up believing that "Pour Some Sugar On Me" was the first thing that singer Joe Elliott ever said. Yea, ok...

Best songs: "Woman," "Rocket," "Animal," "Love Bites," "Pour Some Sugar On Me," "Armageddon It,""Hysteria."

6. Phish- Junta

Most people who know me know that while most of my musical taste is reserved for disgustingly heavy or pathetically sad music, I somehow, over years of listening to nothing even close to Phish, in some way developed a love for them. And this, in my and many other Phish Heads' opinion, is their best. Sets today are filled with songs from this album, and this may be the perfect example of their ability to mix long, jazzy solos and musical breaks with odd children's circus music or whatever you'd call it. If someone wants to give Phish a chance, I always say to start with this album- if you hate it, there's no hope for you ever liking them. From the fun fairytale-telling of "Fee" to the unbelievably stupid but catchy "Dinner And A Movie" to the 1-2 punch of compositional grandiosity of "The Divided Sky" and "David Bowie," this one has it all. I'd skip the last 3 songs though, they only hurt an otherwise perfect Phish album. 

Best songs: "Fee," "You Enjoy Myself," "The Divided Sky," "David Bowie," "Fluff's Travels."

5. Bon Jovi- Slippery When Wet

I loved Bon Jovi in the 80's. Bon Jovi and Poison were pretty much all I listened to when I was kid. In fact, my mom loved Bon Jovi too, so we could listen to his albums on the way home from school all the time. This is the second best Bon Jovi album, and while it has some 80's ballad lame stuff on it ("Without  Love," "Never Say Goodbye"), it also has some of Bon Jovi's best songs: "You Give Love A Bad Name," "Wanted Dead Or Alive," "Livin' On A Prayer," and the vastly underrated "I'd Die For You." This album is synthesizers, solos and cowbells everywhere, but at the heart of it all, great rock songs with Jon Bon Jovi and Richie Sambora's fantastic harmonies. Laugh all you want, this is a great album.

Best songs: "You Give Love A Bad Name," "Livin' On A Prayer," "Wanted Dead Or Alive," "I'd Die For You," "Wild In The Streets."

4. Poison- Open Up and Say... Ahh!

This album ties Bon Jovi's "New Jersey" for my favorite album of my childhood. At the time, this was all I listened to. Every notebook was covered in Poison symbols, every wall in my room had Poison posters (which now weirds me out, since they were usually either shirtless or wearing women's clothing and makeup), and I was OBSESSED with C.C. Deville and his glorious guitar playing and equally glorious pink fluff hair. I can trace every urge to be a rock star/musician in general to wanting to be C.C Deville as a kid. I still remember when my brother got the tape for his birthday and we blasted the whole thing on a terrible boom box in our dining room. When I hear the songs now, and think about how over-the-top sexual they were, I sympathize with my parents, who knew their darling children didn't know what the songs were about, but probably cringed at us singing along to the lyrics. Over time, this album lost some of its power, but when it came out (and I was 7), nothing sounded better. Great rockers ("Love on the Rocks," "Nothin' But a Good Time") party blues songs ("Your Mama Don't Dance") the other contender for best ballad ever ("Every Rose Has Its Thorn") and my favorite song from my childhood, "Fallen Angel" make this album full of memories. I fell hard for a girl in 6th grade who was a foster child and had had a really tough life- "Fallen Angel" was her soundtrack, and I still think about her every time I hear this song. It was, and still remains one of my favorite songs ever- a fantastic, sad, beautiful song that still rocks (and has an awesome solo). Every time I hear the solo fade out and the chords kick back in at 2:53, I smile. Thank you, Poison.

Best songs: "Love On The Rocks," "Nothin' But A Good Time," "Tearin' Down The Walls," "Fallen Angel," "Every Rose Has Its Thorn."

3. Bon Jovi- New Jersey

Poison and Bon Jovi dominated my childhood, and while the theatrics and image of Poison won the heart of my 8 year old version, Bon Jovi has emerged the winner over time- they just wrote great (and better) songs. Every song on this album is awesome, and despite some production values and dated guitar sounds here and there, this is a fantastic album even today. It starts with the 6 minute epic, "Lay Your Hands On Me," beginning with weird sound effects, a huge tribal drum beat, people screaming HEY, and Bon Jovi telling us what we're in for. It then goes into a sweet little melody over an organ, with a church chorus singing backup, before exploding into perfect 80's pop hair metal/pure rock and roll. At that time, I hadn't heard anyone be so theatric, epic and interesting while still having a great song to back it all up. From there, it goes into "Bad Medicine," which would normally be the best song on an album, if that album wasn't this one. I still get shivers from the build up in "Blood On Blood," and the absurd note Jon hits in "I'll Be There For You" (at 3:59). Even the stupid ending song "Love For Sale" is fantastic. This album may be too grandiose and overproduced, or too "stadium rock" for some people, but to me, it's perfect- every song is huge, with group vocals everywhere, perfect solos, perfect harmonies, perfect songs. This is the best Bon Jovi would ever be, and I'm happy it was one of my main introductions into rock music. 

Best songs: "Lay Your Hands On Me," "Bad Medicine," "Blood On Blood," "Wild Is The Wind," "Stick To Your Guns," "I'll Be There For You."

2. Primus- Frizzle Fry

In 1990, there was no band on earth who sounded like Primus. And in 2011, there still isn't. I had a friend in 6th grade who was that friend every music nerd had- the one who told you about weird bands you'd never heard of. His name was Zeb, and he gave me Primus, Ween, and Ministry. Thanks, Zeb. It feels weird to write about how much Poison and Bon Jovi meant to me over the course of my life, and rate an incredibly strange album with a guy melting in a frying pan on the cover higher, but this is one of the very few tapes I owned that I wore out from listening to so much. And it still rules. This is the album where Primus got everything right- the songs are the best, the musicianship is incredible, and for a band known for their bass player's skills, this album showcased their oft-ignored and forever underrated guitar work. From the evil of "Too Many Puppies" and "The Toys Go Winding Down" to the rocking and weird "Mr. Knowitall" and "Pudding Time," to the pure awesomeness of "Frizzle Fry and "Spaghetti Western" (which still has one of my favorite opening beats and bass line combinations ever), this album just rocks all the way through. It's also Primus' heaviest album, which is clearly a sound they should have stuck with. 

Best songs: "To Defy The Laws Of Tradition," "Too Many Puppies," "Frizzle Fry," "The Toys Go Winding Down," "Spaghetti Western."

1. Faith No More- The Real Thing

There is no other album in my collection that I have listened to more. Sure, there's some classics that I've listened to a LOT, but no other album is this old (22 YEARS!!), and certainly no album that old still gets repeated listens each year. I am incredibly proud that, other than the soundtrack to St. Elmo's Fire, this is truly my first favorite album. I got the single to "Epic" with "Edge Of The World" as the B-side (remember tape singles?!) and pretty much wore it out. I finally bought this (and if I remember correctly, this was the first tape I saved money for weeks to buy (for 10 bucks)), and was just blown away. I had no idea at that time that I would still be freaking out about how good this album is.

As much as I don't want to mess with a classic, I wish the band would re-record this, since the only thing it suffers from is production (slap bass and echoed drums) and Mike Patton not yet realizing how good of a singer he was and producing a much more nasal version of his now classic voice. But that being said, that's all part of the charm. This album is more unique than anything that came out within several years of it, and has truly taken me to another world on most listens. I used to listen to this in the dark on long drives home from my Grandmother's house, listening intently to the sick and creepy lyrics of "The Real Thing," trying to understand what the hell "Zombie Eaters" was about, and revelling in just how odd it was that an instrumental song (the first I ever heard) based largely on Indian sounding synthesizers could rock so hard. I didn't even know "War Pigs" was a Black Sabbath cover until years later, and I still say Faith No More do it better.

This album is also probably the only album I can think of where the middle of it is the strongest- the metal evil of "Surprise! You're Dead!" into the haunting, creepy and beautiful sadness of "Zombie Eaters" to the epic and forever changing and building "The Real Thing," is just fantastic. I feel bad for "Underwater Love," it stands no chance coming after those three songs.

The guitar tone is incredible, the songwriting is unlike anything I'd ever heard, I've still never heard synthesizer and keyboards used better, and they mixed EVERYTHING- rap, metal, punk, funk, soul, beautiful piano, lounge music, death metal, etc. PERFECTLY into a weird sound all their own. This is one of those bands that I think wouldn't have produced anything like this if a single member wasn't in the band, and, at least for me, since this is my favorite album of theirs, this was just a perfect mix of time, creativity, inspiration, production, musicianship, and whatever drugs they were taking. This is just a phenomenal album that is the definition of groundbreaking and I am incredibly happy I've had it for all but 7 years of my life.  

Best songs: "Epic," "Falling To Pieces," "Surprise! You're Dead," "Zombie Eaters," "The Real Thing," "Woodpecker From Mars."